Holy Taco blog has an informative how-to article about how to get lucky with a bridesmaid. Read it here
or you can read the best parts below:
Find the Slutty One
Bridesmaids come in all shapes and sizes, but there’s a 100% chance that one of the bridesmaids is going to be sluttier than the others. Just like your first day in jail, it’s important that you identify right away who is most likely to [bleep] you, then make sure you always know where that person is so that you’re prepared for when it might happen. There are a few simple ways to quickly identify the slutty bridesmaid:
- She’s decided to cut her ugly bridesmaid's dress significantly shorter than the other bridesmaids.
- She goes out of her way to offer up a generic, unsolicited introduction.
- She’s a raging drunk, saying things like, “I was gonna get fake tits, I might still, I dunfugginknow.”
Booze Her Up Get that chick drunk. Really drunk. Don’t cling onto her and feed her drinks. Just make sure you drop another one off every time you walk past her. Think of alcohol as the fullback to your running back: it opens holes for you so that you don’t have to.
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